I’ve lost a significant amount of weight over the course of the last couple of years. In August of 2020, I weighed 210 pounds. I’m 5’7″, so I was in the obese category. I’ve been short, fat and ugly for as long as I can remember, so I decided to do something about the one part of that trio that I can actually do something about.
I joined Noom and I started taking what I eat seriously. I’ve dieted before, and I’ve lost weight before, but Noom helped me change the way I think about eating. Although I still am able to eat things that aren’t necessarily good for me, I don’t eat nearly as much as I used to at one sitting, and I don’t crave crap that will put more weight back on.
To be honest, getting COVID helped. I started Noom in August, 2020, and the Rona got me in October, 2020. I completely lost my senses of taste and smell for months, and it’s much easier to eat healthy when you can’t taste or smell anything. By the time my lost senses started to make their pathetic return, I had made my eating practices pretty habitual. There were (and still are) lots of salads if we go out to eat. Lean proteins, vegetables, and rice are pretty common in the dishes I prepare at home. Even the wife tries to cook meals that are healthier, and the one kid we have left at home is usually fairly on board with the healthy eating.
My lowest weight at the end of my Noom program, which hit in April of 2021, was 145 pounds. I hadn’t weighed 145 pounds since grade school (and I’m talking like probably pre-sixth grade). I was around 170 pounds when I entered my freshman year of high school. What the hell was wrong with me?
A short aside on Noom: Noom worked for me, but I took it seriously and was 100% committed to following the program. If I had half-assed it or given up during one of the many plateaus I experienced during my weight loss journey, I know it wouldn’t have worked. Did I ever fall off the wagon and cheat? Hell yeah, I did! But the next day, I was right back on the program and I didn’t beat myself up because of a momentary weakness. I would never recommend any weight loss program to anyone who isn’t committed to making it happen. And diets are stupid, because they create temporary results that stop when the diet ends. You really have to change the way you eat on a daily basis… forever, and that’s not nearly as horrible as it sounds.
So, since my all-time low weight as an adult, I started doing some regular weight lifting. Nothing serious, but I’m consistent. I’m not trying to be a muscle head and I don’t have megarexia. I am by no stretch of the imagination “buff.” I have a little more muscle than I have had through the rest of adulthood. My weight bounces around in the mid-150s, and I’m pretty okay with that. I feel like I’m probably the healthiest I have been since, again, grade school.
Here’s the thing about losing a relatively large amount of weight, much of which you have carried around for most of your adult life: your skin stretches. The large majority of my weight was carried in my stomach. I felt like I looked like a pregnant dude for as long as I can remember. I’m guessing that, if I had considered trying to be less gross earlier in life, my skin would have firmed back up. Young skin is more supple. Seeing as how I was in my 50s before I decided to take my fitness semi-seriously, my skin isn’t very supple or elastic. It’s not tightening; my skin just hangs there. And there’s a lot of skin. And, yes, my hanging-skin cummerbund bothers me!
It’s weird; I wanted to lose weight to be healthier, but I also to be more confident in my body. I’ve always had horrible body image, and that has affected so many things in my life in a negative way. Confidence is the key to success. Lack of confidence will lead to some pretty crappy jobs and a career path that is less than financially rewarding. I had hoped to turn that around somewhat.
Now, although a lot of the fat is gone, I have all the hanging skin in it’s place. I still have to avoid looking at myself in the mirror after a shower until I get a shirt on. If I happen to need to pick something up off the floor and I happen to have my shirt off at the same time, I need to avoid looking in the general region of my mid-section. If I forget about “not looking” and accidentally catch a glance, it’s like The Blob is trying to detach itself from my stomach.
It’s horrifying.
So, the huge gain in self-confidence and positive body image that I was hoping for weren’t found on this journey. But I can tell you this: the small boost in my opinion of my appearance (with shirt on, of course) feels so much better to me than any food on this planet will ever taste. So instead of ordering a Big Mouth Burger and fries at Chili’s, I’ll opt for something off of the Guiltless Grill Menu. Instead of close to 2000 calories for a meal, I’d be looking at closer to 500 calories, and it fills me up without being stuffed.
And as much as the loose-skin blob on my belly bothers me, it’s still better than having that horror-movie abomination filled with fat…